Every Sacrifice

So I had "Heavenwards, Always", by Kathy Kanewske, playing in the background today as we were getting ready for nap time. My daughter and I were reading one of her stories, when she suddenly started whispering something rhythmically under her breath. I paused to listen.

"Every sacrifice and trial we face fills our treasury with your good grace."

Joy moment!

I tried singing along with her. She said, very emphatically, "No mommy can sing," and went right back on singing along. I just sat and listened to her for a few moments, completely in awe of how much she soaks in, and how much of what soaks in she is able to make her own.

And that one line, repeating over and over, brought back to my mind what has been floating around since Lent began, about sacrifice and how to teach love and service to our little ones. Even though she is not understanding every aspect of everything we say or do, I know these moments are somehow being etched into her person. She is being formed by what she sees and hears and participates in.

But developmentally things are tricky. We're smack dab in the middle of the "mine" stage and the "no" stage. Though these days those two words aren't heard as much, the stage shows in her actions. The baby brother, who is cruising now, often has his hands picked up and pushed off of whatever furniture he adheres himself to, resulting in the dampened thud of cloth diapered bum hitting wood floor. Or there is the "no J can touch this" accompanied by a swift shove, push, head butt, or really any effective form of two-year-old force. I'm realizing more and more that how I respond in these situations will also in some ways form who she becomes, and who the baby becomes. And I can tell you that however I react doesn't seem to be having the desired effect for anyone.

There is only so much separating one can do. Only so much distraction, so much reasoning. The time-outs are rule of law now, and the situation is escalating. It is such a struggle coming up with good solutions, communicating them effectively, and remaining consistent in the limits and consequences. And this seems like such a common parenting concern!

Phew! Parenting is tiring. But in a good way. Because one minute you're about to lose your cool (or do!), and the next their singing to you, or playing [gnawing on] ball with each other, or actually "good nice sharing." And every sacrifice and trial we face fills the treasury of grace.